Last night there was a cat fight. It happened around 3 a.m. Julie said it almost made her have a heart attack. Me? Well, again, sometimes an old dog has to play on the only leg he's got, so I laid low. I mean, lately, I get threatened with my very existence if I bark during the day when the baby is sleeping. Why on earth would I want to tempt fate and bark like the devil and wake the baby up at 3 in the morning? Why, I'd want to bite my own hotdog off for that!
Yeah, it doesn't matter that those little ones frick with my nap schedule. "Oh no, don't wake the baby up!!" (Insert mocking tone)
How about, "Don't wake Howard up you screeching little monsters!?!" I need my beauty sleep so I can maintain my shiny coated magnificent bastard status!
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
Bull Hockey
I needed some "me" time today. These kids drive me crazy. The little six month old is starting to crawl. Any day now he'll be after me like little Pepe Le Pew. Today he tried to grab my tail, and Brad caught him just in time. That would not have ended well. If there is one part of me that I do not like messed with, it is my tail. My tail is long and fluffy, and could knock bricks off of tables it is so powerful! My tail is not a teething toy!!! Why, I think I could even behead Orange Effer with my tail!
I decided to take my "me" time outside in the sun. We had some cloud cover, so I just rolled over on my back and watched the clouds float by. I watched the clouds float by while I dreamed of more peaceful times. Times when there was not a 2 year old little diva living at our house. Times when it was just me and Brad and Julie. Those were the days.
Not to worry. My appetite is back. I ate three times today, and the one benefit of having a 2 year old in the house, is that she likes to drop food on me. That I do not mind, however, a few days ago she thought it would be funny to spit her pop-tarts out on my magnificent shiny coat. THAT was bull-hockey, and I will not tolerate it!
PS Black and White Effer, after a long absence, is back. He was right outside my window eyeballing the birds nest. I barked and scared the white right off of him. Bet I won't see him again for awhile.
I decided to take my "me" time outside in the sun. We had some cloud cover, so I just rolled over on my back and watched the clouds float by. I watched the clouds float by while I dreamed of more peaceful times. Times when there was not a 2 year old little diva living at our house. Times when it was just me and Brad and Julie. Those were the days.
Not to worry. My appetite is back. I ate three times today, and the one benefit of having a 2 year old in the house, is that she likes to drop food on me. That I do not mind, however, a few days ago she thought it would be funny to spit her pop-tarts out on my magnificent shiny coat. THAT was bull-hockey, and I will not tolerate it!
PS Black and White Effer, after a long absence, is back. He was right outside my window eyeballing the birds nest. I barked and scared the white right off of him. Bet I won't see him again for awhile.
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